in the room

Since hearing the song, Save Me - written and performed by Bryan and Katie Torwalt - I have caught myself thinking about the significance of 'being in the room' over and over again. A friend shared this song with me a few months ago, and the moment I listened to the song, I was captured by the weight of these lyrics:

"I just wanna be in the room when my heart says yes

Just to see You move; so I can breathe again

I wanna be lost in love, hallelujah!

I wanna be in the room, when You move."

- Bryan and Katie Torwalt

Recently, with my life [and probably yours too] being confined to pretty much one space, these words have been echoing in my heart. And it has been a constant reminder to me; to be in the room.

Being in the room is a choice and doesn’t happen by accident or coincidence.

This takes me back to my university days, especially first year at Wits. As a total newbie on a huge campus with so many massive buildings and so many rooms. It was so easy to find myself getting lost and finding myself in the wrong room. Fortunately that didn’t happen often, and I am so thankful for the people around campus that you could ask for directions to find the right room.

I particularly remember struggling to find exam venues. I would plan to find the venue before the day so I knew exactly where to go [and so I wouldn't be late]. Being in the wrong room for an exam is anything but ideal. Just being in a room isn’t enough, it’s all about being in the right room.

Before our lives were completely turned upside down we needed to be intentional about being in the room. Our lives were scheduled, and making an effort to attend the things we said yes to, was mandatory. But when we could choose which virtual room we wanted to be in, it was often easier to not be in the Zoom at all, or to be in the Zoom but not present [we have all switched our video off and muted the microphone], distant, distracted and disengaged.

A room may just be a space, but the way you feel in a room is as a result of the atmosphere. We choose to be in a room, because of the way the room makes us feel. Or rather, because of the atmosphere we experience. Experiences are largely based on emotion.

Rooms evoke emotions, and something I have realised over the past few months is that we get to decide what we do with emotions that are evoked in rooms in our lives.

Whether you choose to see rooms as a physical position, or a posture of the heart, both matter.

My relationship with God is a very important room to me. One that requires both position and posture. And in moments when I am completely overwhelmed by anxiety [let’s face it we’re all human] this is the room I run to most.

When I am not in the room with God, my mind convinces me to say no because it would be impossible on my own. It just wouldn’t make sense, but when I choose to be in the room, the posture of my heart shifts and I can see God working in moments that would have completely taken me off guard. With God, I can breathe, I can love and I can see Him move. Who wouldn’t want to be in that room?

Like a university student, studying for a degree. There will be subjects that make no sense, and weeks where all assignments are due on the same day, but all of that would be irrelevant if the student was going to the wrong lectures. Getting a degree is not about enjoying the content taught every room, but rather about being content that what is taught in the room will get you what you want, the degree.

If we have resolve in life [something that we want to achieve, no matter what] we will not be disheartened by the things that don’t make sense, or overwhelmed when everything seems to happen all at once. We will choose to be present in the room. Embracing the moments that, although challenging, equip us for purpose.

Most importantly, I choose to be present in the room, in the moment. Life is full of many different rooms, but I choose to be content in the room I am in, right now.

Being in the room requires position and posture.

I choose a position of presence and a posture of purpose.

JCS